Tuesday, January 22, 2013

The Power of Positive Thinking (Part 12)

Putting it all together

In Order to Kill the ANTs…Feed the emotional ANTeater:
1. Whenever you notice an ANT entering your mind, train yourself to recognize it and write it down on a piece of paper.
2. Identify the type of ANT.

3. Kill the ANTs by feeding your emotional ANTeater by talking back to your ANTs. This will take away their power to control your moods. 

              ANT: "
This person doesn’t like me!" 
Type of ANT: Mind Reading 
Kill the ANT: I don’t know that, maybe she’s having a bad day?

              ANT: "Mr. Smith is a Jerk!"

Type of ANT: Labeling
Kill the ANT: Sometimes all of us are jerks. He may be under a lot of pressure?

How can you improve your self-esteem using this technique?
• You cannot earn worth through what you do.
• Achievements can bring you satisfaction but not happiness. Self-worth based on accomplishments is "pseudo-esteem."
• You cannot base a valid sense of self-worth on your looks, talent, fame, or fortune. Marilyn Monroe, Freddie Prinz, Kurt Cobain and other famous suicide victims attest to this grim truth.
• You cannot base your inherent self-worth on love, approval, friendship, or a capacity for close, caring human relationships. You cannot truly love others unless you first love yourself.
• Only your own sense of self-worth determines how you feel.
• The first step to improved self-esteem or self-love is to pay attention to what YOU say and think about yourself. What type of ANTs do you have?
• So how can one develop a sense of self-esteem? You don’t have to! You don’t have to do anything worthy to create or deserve self-esteem; all you have to do is Kill the ANTs. Because your ANTs are wrong!

Something to think about:
Watch your THOUGHTS, they become feelings.
Watch your feelings, they become words.
Watch your words, they become actions.
Watch your actions, they become habits.
Watch your habits, they become your character.
Watch your character, it becomes your destiny!

Monday, January 21, 2013

The Power of Positive Thinking (Part 11)

Red ANT 10 "Blaming"

• Blaming is very harmful! It's one of the worst of all ANTs. When you blame something or someone else for the problems in your life, you become a passive victim of circumstances and you make it very difficult to do anything to change your situation. You take very little responsibility for your problems. When something goes wrong at home or at work, you try to find someone or something to blame.

• Examples: "It wasn’t my fault that___"; "That wouldn’t have happened if___."; "How was I supposed to know___"; "If you'd only done this differently then____."; "You ruined my life!"

• REALITY CHECK: Whenever you play the "blame game" you become powerless to change anything. Taking personal responsibility for the circumstances in your life will be empowering and uplifting.

• Remember the lessons so far: YOU are ONLY responsible for your thoughts, feelings, and actions! You Are NOT responsible for other's thoughts, feelings, or actions; They are!  You can only try to Influence others; You cannot Control others!  It doesn't matter what You ask of Life, but what Life asks of You that matters!  

Sunday, January 20, 2013

The Power of Positive Thinking (Part 10)

ANT 9 "Personalizing"

• You see yourself as the cause of some negative external event which in fact you were not primarily responsible for. This is the mother of all guilt. You feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders.

• For example: "My boss was short with me today, he/she must be mad at me." "My child is failing in school, it’s my fault for not spending more time tutoring him." "This person was rude to me, I must have said something wrong." "That person was mean and angry with me, what did I do to make them so mad?"

• REALITY CHECK: There are many other reasons for other’s behavior besides your negative explanations. You confuse influence with control over others. In your role (no matter how powerful or menial) you can certainly influence others, but you cannot control them. What the other person does is ultimately their responsibility, not yours!

• Blessed Mother Teresa once said:
People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered; Forgive them anyway. 
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis it is between you and God; It was never between you and them anyway.

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